In addition to learning to relax your body and quiet your mind prenatally so that those skills will be ready-at-hand when labour begins, there is another aspect of relaxation, or maybe comfort, that is more intellectual in nature. Becoming comfortable with the realities of labour, getting to know terminology and feeling good about your ability to get information and use it productively will make you feel more at ease as labour progresses. If you don’t have a certain degree of comfort with the practical side of things, you’ll be less likely to be able to let go and allow your relaxation techniques do their thing. Continue reading →
Relaxation is an important part of birth preparation, but that statement may not be as self-explanatory as it seems. In truth, there are a variety of things that I could be referring to that are all equally important in terms of prenatal life as well as preparing for labour itself.
Recently I attended a doula meeting at Willow Books here in Toronto. The meeting was held to discuss postpartum mood disorders and Jessica Cherniak of Fourth Trimester was there to share her wisdom and stories from her thirteen-plus years as a birth and postpartum doula.
I learned a lot of valuable things at the meeting, like how peer support can make all the difference before you’re ready for group support or that most women who experience postpartum mood disorders are first diagnosed by their partners before they themselves even realize that something isn’t right.
The main thing that I came away thinking about though, was The Village. As in, “it takes a village to raise a child.” At first blush, it seems as though that classic phrase is telling us that children need many people – they need fathers and mothers, teachers and clerics, brothers and sisters, clowns and poets, aunts and uncles. This is true. The more diverse the array of positive influences in a child’s life, the more wise and tolerant and confident she will grow to be. No doubt.
After listening to what Jessica had to say, and sharing with the other doulas in the room though, I began to think about the other meaning of that phrase, that women are not meant to raise their babies in isolation, they need the village to shoulder some of the burden. Just as those babies can thrive when they are cared for and taught and played with and hugged by a variety of caring folk, so too do mothers need those folk in order to thrive. To thrive as mothers and as women. Continue reading →